Tag: selfishness

Why are we so selfish?

Hi all !!

I’m actually not posing the question in the light you may be assuming….  so read on, and maybe you’ll end up as thoroughly confused as I am.  🤣 #sorrynotsorry

Why, when we KNOW that God’s plan is the absolute best for us, that His ways are best, that His grace is sufficient, do we still hurt/get mad/get sad when things don’t run the course we kinda want them to?

I’ll use a very real example…. DEATH !!  When my Dad went to be with the Lord at 5.55pm on April 15th, 2017,  I fell to the floor and wailed.. like FULL ON wailed !! Now, if you’ve followed my blog for awhile over on my ‘Lovely Shiloh’ blog site, you’ll know that I received a vision from the Lord of this moment… if you haven’t read it, you find it HERE.   I’ve asked myself so many times since… Why was I so upset?  This was literally the moment my Dad had craved his ENTIRE life….  he was going to meet Jesus for crying out loud…  why, if I love him as much I know I do…  why was I not fist pumping the air with the biggest smile on my face for what he was experiencing at that moment?

I fully realise that this is a question that has a very obvious answer, but still… when I don’t doubt a single word in God’s Word, when I know his promises are true, when I know Romans 8:18 to be true… WHY did I not see this for the moment it was… the greatest moment of my Dad’s life?

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Spoiler alert… I don’t actually have the answer to this, other than the obvious ones…  ‘The level of grief you experience reflects the level of love you have for that person.’ & ‘you crave the physical presence of that person in your life.’  These are both wonderful things as it speaks to the relationship you had with that person.  I don’t need to go into how much my Dad meant to me… it’s been covered in several other blogs…. but as a general explanation… He was my rock, my greatest supporter, my example, my friend.. and the best Dad a girl could ever ask for.

When it comes to the loss of a loved one, I think perhaps it’s enough to WANT to have that type of faith level, even while knowing that it’s perhaps not possible to be 110% selfless in this regard (& this regard only, to be clear).  It is certainly easier nearly 3yrs later to be ok with God’s plan for Dad… I mean heck, it was easier once the initial sting went… but there are still days, moments of days, when I so crave the presence of my Dad.  Oh the comfort felt knowing that I will see him again !!! 💜

You can also ask this question of yourself in other regards tho. Why am I so selfish that I want this one, or that thing.. when perhaps that isn’t what God wants for me?  Even if we’re very self disciplined and accept the opening & closing of doors in our lives as the Lord wills, it’s pretty much impossible to not feel emotions over each situation.

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I think it’s only a positive thing if we are striving to be 100% happy with WHATEVER God’s plans are for our lives.  I think it’s the growth we strive to achieve in how we react to things that defines the speed at which we mature in the faith.

I give the example of a close friendship of mine that very sadly came to an end a few years ago.  It’s only now, several years later, with a new friendship formed with that  person, that I can see God’s hand in that situation.  Why those things had to happen.   To be clear, how I always reacted during the hurt of that time did not need to happen, but that’s the biggest thing to come out of what was a terrible time.  I was not in a place, was not spiritually mature enough, to accept/see God’s will in the situation.  He was dragging me away kicking and screaming… and man was I kicking and screaming.

Through pain comes growth !  Such a true statement.  It’s part of my testimony now… and we all know.. we don’t up with a testimony without a test or two.  Sad, but true.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could just learn this stuff quicker than we do?  ha ha.  #wishfulthinking

I’m thankful for God’s Word that gives me such encouragement at all times, but mostly in those times when perhaps I’m not understanding God’s plan.

“When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?” Psalm 8:3-4
“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”
Proverbs 19:21
“But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, oh you of little faith!” Luke 12:28
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:9
“For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.” Psalm 48:14
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.” Isaiah 40:28
“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom all those who practice it have a good understanding. His praise endures forever!” Psalm 111:10
Forever Thankful !!
Blessings Peeps
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